Unsolicited

A few weeks ago, I had a doctor's appointment. Addie came with me and was of course the hit of the waiting room. Her favorite admirer was an 80 year old grandma who just couldn't get enough. She also couldn't comment enough on my child or my poor mothering skills, even as she handed my baby her disgustingly dirty keys so that Addie could slobber all over them and internalize the millions of germs that called the keys home.

Her favorite comment was the following and was repeated multiple times:

"Well, isn't she such a LARGE child. My babies were all so tiny...it is strange to see such a LARGE baby." 

After several comments, the feeling that the woman was calling my baby a ginormous cow finally got the better of me and I gently informed her that Addie was actually one of the smallest babies her age, ranging in the 5th percentile. She looked at me like I was such a whippersnapper to give her sass.

As the waiting room cleared, it was grandma and I and Addie left. Unfortunately, it came time for Addie's nap.

Now, when Addie falls asleep anywhere but her crib, she cannot be cradled in my arms or snuggled in a blanket or any of those normal ways. She has to be held upright so she can look at everything and when she is ready, she will lay her head against my chest and let me know she is ready to sleep. ONLY then will she succumb to sleep. After a half hour of walking Addie around the office, trying to get her to wear down and put her dang head on my chest, grandma spoke up:

"Didn't the doctors ever teach you how to hold a baby?"

OOOOOOOOOOOOO. It was a good thing I was across the room with my arms full.